You Thought This Was Going to be Easy??

It's been awhile since the start of my class, but the instructor wasn't lying or exaggerating when he greeted us with a "You thought this was going to be easy?". All of us fresh-faced students sat there flipping through our crammed-full 3" binders and wearing our plastic nametags that will identify us as "Student" in every field rotation, clinical rotation, and class period. Even our program-issued polo shirts identify us as "Student."

Once our expectations were laid out for us that day, students started to leave. Some never even showed up to claim their binders and nametags and were accordingly dropped from the roster.

The ones that have stayed so far are already getting bogged down, and as we were all told last class, we're really only beginning. My head is swimming with lymphatic physiology, hemocrit, blood antigens, pharmacodynamics, and medication schedules. My program is accelerated - we will learn in 5 months what most programs take 10-12 months to complete. This draws people to the class that have a 2, and even 3, hour drive. The ones that have stayed with us are motivated, and we all have our own stories for being here.

For about a year now, I've been fortunate enough to spend about 20 hours a month with a paramedic partner. Rarely, prior to my "release" as a BLS Attendant-in-Charge, had I ever run on a BLS unit. The day that I was released was a typical Southern hot and humid day, and my unit was sent to a park for a referee who was severely dehydrated. He was still conscious, breathing, and was fully oriented. However, I could look at him and tell that he needed some fluid. It occurred to me that I couldn't fix him - I couldn't even start the job that would be finished at the hospital. I got him as comfortable as I could, gave some oxygen and cold packs, and initiated transport. Our transport time is almost always 7 minutes or less, but I still wanted to help this very friendly patient. My skills weren't enough, and I left the call feeling horribly inadequate.

I then decided to begin the road to ALS provider. It's a rough road. I have the fortune of many paramedics to look up to, and I want to make them proud. I want to make my patients confident in their decision to call for me. And most of all, I want to make myself proud in my abilities.

Thanks for reading and joining me on this trip. For now, my instructor has told me to be "as one" with my Paramedic Care book, and it's right on top of that binder...time to get back to work.